Transparent Freedom

“Be watchful, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong.  Let all that you do be done in love.” (1 Corinthians 16:13-14)

Five Imperatives.  Not electives or options.  Divine Mandates.  Paul affirms the need to be strong and resolved, but also to be redeemed by grace.  His call to grit and grace keeps men from the extremes of either abdicating or abusing leadership.  It galvanizes men to be strong and humble leaders.

1. Be Watchful

It means to pay attention, be on the alert, be awake, be vigilant, and be discerning.  The word used here is most often used concerning the coming of Christ–stressing the need to be ready for His return.  But it’s also used in the context of being watchful because of the reality of our spiritual enemy–and that’s the context here.  Satan is hunting you personally. 

You have to know your surroundings and compensate for your vulnerabilities.  It could be when you’re tired…when you’re traveling…or when you’re under trial.  Your leadership starts with self-control.  You can’t lead others until you lead yourself.

2. Stand Firm in the Faith

Be steadfast and stable.  Be resolute, especially in your convictions.  You have to be truth-driven, Scripture-soaked and washed.  You have to know and articulate the Gospel.  You’re only able to stand firm and put off the fear of man when you are informed by the fear of God.

3. Act Like Men

Act mature.  Put away childish thinking and behavior.  Stop the silliness and nonsense.  Manhood requires being able to give and receive this kind of constructive criticism.

As you hear that charge from Paul, where do you need most to mature?  Where are you failing to engage in your God-given assignment and identity? 

4. Be Strong

The great power in Paul’s words come from an alternative translation of the Greek that renders the phrase: “be strengthened.”  In other words, don’t rely on your own strength, rely on Christ.  Move beyond the macho weight-pumping strength to the grace-induced, spirit-filled, Christ-resolved, Gospel-driven strength to lead.

5. Let All You Do Be Done In Love

Without love and passion, the previous four entries will just be fleshly, abrasive, and harsh.  Be firm, but not hard.  Tenacity and tenderness.  The most attractive and effective element of your leadership will be your love.

This is what it means for you as a man to lead with selfless, sacrificial love:

Lead from the position of humility.  Jesus demonstrated His love by washing His disciples’ feet.  Manhood is not about taking and leading for your own gain.  It’s about serving.

Put others ahead of yourself.  In the example and power of Christ, you should esteem others.  Look out for others.  Don’t take credit from others–applaud them.  Say NO to yourself and YES to others.

Love people instead of things.  What really matters are the people God gives you the opportunity to love.  Your orientation has to be to love people and use things–not the other way around. 

Have a soft heart for the people in your family, neighborhood, church, and workplace.  Let your heart be broken by the suffering people around you, especially those who are headed toward eternal suffering.

BONUS LESSON FROM PAUL!

A self-made man is incomplete.  Mature manhood is forged in the body of Christ.  Be intentional about cultivating at least three key relationships based on Paul’s example:

1. Paul: You need a mentor, a coach, or shepherd who is further along in their walk with Christ.

2. Timothy: You need to be a Paul to another man (or men).

3. Barnabas: You need a go-to friend who is a peer.  (Ask each other, ‘What are we doing that’s risky for the Gospel?’)

(From A Guide to Biblical Manhood, Stinson & Dumas)

This Week’s Resource: How to Kill Sin (Part 3) by John Piper

Next Week: Act Manfully (11): Reading Your Wife

For there is one God, and there is one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus.
(1 Timothy 2:5)

All our efforts to understand or live out our design as men culminate in Jesus.

The crux of biblical manhood is in knowing who Jesus was as a man, what He came to do, why every man must wrestle with this man, and what He calls us to as men today.

Led by the Spirit and in obedience to the Father, Jesus lived out perfect manhood.  He ate, drank, worked, rested, read, traveled, talked, listened, laughed, and cried and all without sin, but for the glory of God.  He interacted with friends and family, rich and poor, pious and perverse, leaders and outcasts and engaged each one without pride, envy, respect of persons, contempt or malice.  Instead, He brought truth and love to each encounter in ways that often confounded those observing Him.

He spoke with authority.  He healed the sick, cast out demons, raised the dead, and calmed the storm.  He preached the good news of the kingdom of God to many towns.  He submitted His words to the Father who sent Him.  He gave life abundantly.  He served and gave his life as a ransom for many.  He sought and saved the lost.  He suffered many things and was rejected by many.  He was killed, and he rose.

Jesus suffered like no other man, but “for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame” (Hebrews 12:2).

Jesus rules today as king, preparing for the full consummation of the Kingdom of God.

What we do with the life and sacrifice of Jesus is life’s ultimate question and our only hope for eternal life.

When the God of the universe takes on the form of man we are compelled to take notice, repent of indwelling sin, submit to His lordship, and seek refuge in the only man that can save us from our sins.  Reckoning with Jesus is the first act in redeeming masculinity.  He is the epitome and example of biblical manhood and without Him we will only distort our God-given identity and role.  It’s our unapologetic desire that you come face-to-face with the one man who can redeem your masculinity from distortion and transform your life for His glory.

(From A Guide to Biblical Manhood, Stinson & Dumas)

This Week’s Resource: Men at War-Pursuing an Undistracted Passion for God (Part 1), (Part 2)
“You will not know what prayer is for / until you know that life is war.” (J. Piper)

Next Week: Act Manfully (10): Paul-Grace and Grit for the Gospel

David committed adultery with Bathsheba (2 Samuel 11).  Solomon married foreign wives who turned him toward foreign gods (1 Kings 11). 

Being enticed by women and distanced from God is tragic.

Under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, Solomon wrote a warning about sexual temptation and David recorded a prayer of repentance of his sexual sin.  Let these guide you.

Flee Sexual Temptation, Proverbs 5

Solomon’s wisdom in Proverbs 5 offers a bold strategy for fighting lust.  Read it.
Here are a few summary points:

• Be wise and have a predetermined response to enticement.
• Unmask sin’s beauty.  Honey is sweet, but the bee stings.
• Don’t depart from the truth.  Don’t put a question mark where God has put a period.  Deploy extreme strategies to keep far from enticement. (See Matthew 5:27-30)
• You may try to cover your sin, but God will uncover it.  Secret sin on earth is open scandal in heaven.One of the best things you can do is write down 10 things you’d lose if you were caught doing something stupid–wife, family, reputation, education, home, job, etc. 
• Be satisfied with your own marriage.  If you are single, pursue becoming marryable.

Repent Humbly, Psalm 51

If you’ve been enticed into sexual sin, repent and seek God’s gracious forgiveness.  “Repent therefore, and turn again, that your sins may be blotted out, that times of refreshing may come from the presence of the Lord” (Acts 3:19b-20a).  King David’s prayer following his adultery with Bathsheba still serves as a model of humble repentance.  (Click the link above to Psalm 51 to pray through it.)

(From A Guide to Biblical Manhood, Stinson & Dumas)–If you haven’t ordered copies for yourself and all the men you know, you need to do so now.

This Week’s Resource: “Taking Out the Trash”

Next Week: Act Manfully (9): Jesus, The Crux of Biblical Manhood

“Be strong, and show yourself a man, and keep the charge of the LORD your God, walking in his ways and keeping his statutes, his commandments, his rules, and his testimonies, as it is written in the Law of Moses.” (1 Kings 2:2-3)

4. Do the Hardest Task First

As he thought about becoming king, Solomon may have been looking forward to his coronation ceremony and other perks of leadership, but David made it clear that he had work to do first–and much of it would be hard and messy.  But that’s what leaders do.  They ask, “what needs to be done?” and they get at it.

As a matter of principle, procrastinating cultivates passivity.  Attacking your hardest task of the day without delay will build your resistance to passivity. 

So lead with authority.  The man who is cultivating biblical masculinity will not allow things like term papers, taxes, or project deadlines to rule him.  He will exercise dominion over them by doing them in a timely manner.  So do your work now rather than later.

But don’t just be good with tasks, be bold with people.  Make the hard relational move first, too.  Don’t be passive within interpersonal relationships.  Whether it means having a tough conversation, apologizing, or even exercising Matthew 18:15-17 style confrontation, you should do your part first.

5. Swear to Your Own Hurt

Another lesson of David’s instruction to Solomon is the importance of making and keeping commitments.  In one of his Psalms, David writes, “Who shall sojourn in your tent? Who shall dwell on your holy hill?” (15:1).  He responds, “He who walks blamelessly and does what is right and speaks truth in his heart;” but then after a few more characteristics, he adds, “[He] who swears to his own hurt and does not change” (15:4b).  That’s a poetic way to say, “keep your commitments, even when it’s inconvenient.”

Men today struggle with commitments.  When it comes to a commitment, you only have two options: keep the commitment or renegotiate the commitment based on changes in circumstances (e.g. “I know I said I would be there to help you move this afternoon, but I got attacked by a mountain lion this morning, so I’ll be a few minutes late”). 

See tasks through.  Don’t be known for starting and stopping projects.  Get it done.  That’s what leaders do.  Swear to your own hurt and do not change.

6. Obey the Lord

The most enduring lesson of David and Solomon is the importance of obedience to the Lord.  Strong, masculine leadership is tied to obedience.  That means doing what God requires even if it doesn’t seem to offer any practical benefits.  “Sometimes it’s not enough to do your best,” Winston Churchill once said, “you have to do what’s required.”

Following God’s design for biblical manhood can result in great rewards — relational happiness, business success, and personal fulfillment.  But even if it doesn’t, you still have to do it out of obedience. 

A man after God’s own heart doesn’t just demonstrate leadership here and there; he faithfully loves God through obedience.  “For this is the love of God,” the apostle John writes, “that we keep his commandments.  And his commandments are not burdensome.” (1 John 5:3).

(From A Guide to Biblical Manhood, Stinson & Dumas)

This Week’s Resource: A Feast from God for Your Hope and Boldness, John Piper

Next Week: Act Manfully (8), Lessons from David and Solomon on Sex and Sin